tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.comments2015-06-21T02:26:14.170-04:00down the rabbit holeUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger500125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-34745328789856321692015-01-28T16:45:03.693-05:002015-01-28T16:45:03.693-05:00I am so glad of the reboot my friend! I have misse...I am so glad of the reboot my friend! I have missed you writing here. Seeing each other on Facebook is lovely/wonderful, but this whole other portion of our lives is utterly off limits there. Keep talking... :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-63485114364857467932012-08-22T13:07:23.179-04:002012-08-22T13:07:23.179-04:00Many of your beliefs and questions, both of the wo...Many of your beliefs and questions, both of the world and of yourself, are shared by me, and I'm sure by many.<br /><br />I'm so glad to hear that your son wasn't more badly injured. I know such moments make us look at life with fresh eyes and appreciation.<br /><br />love and hugs xxxtheoccasionalmusehttp://www.theoccasionalmuse.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-54620409694273197712012-07-26T11:50:43.503-04:002012-07-26T11:50:43.503-04:00Like Sue, I am happy your reminder was gentle. It ...Like Sue, I am happy your reminder was gentle. It does make life sweeter when we become comfortable with that and savor all moments.<br /><br />YAlais Na'arhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00139544159417142406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-78991764584415944182012-07-25T22:37:16.014-04:002012-07-25T22:37:16.014-04:00I am glad that your son is "fine." The ...I am glad that your son is "fine." The reminder that life is fleeting and fragile is important. How sweet that, this time, you got to be reminded somewhat gently.<br /><br />hugs, swanSuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03961893281142538409noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-44570216391005906652012-07-17T21:27:59.316-04:002012-07-17T21:27:59.316-04:00Yvonne, Thank you. She is making peace with this, ...Yvonne, Thank you. She is making peace with this, but I know this is a terribly hard thing for her. I'm glad you are still out there. I'm glad to see I still have any readers after being MIA for so long.Alicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03027350217120088046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-57968943748901260002012-07-16T11:23:25.458-04:002012-07-16T11:23:25.458-04:00Alice,
Hugs...I'm still out here...Glad you ...Alice, <br /><br />Hugs...I'm still out here...Glad you are still out there too.<br /><br />I'm so sorry for your friend. I am frustrated that she was even given the option of terminating the pregnancy and then having it snatched away...but now it has been, I hope that she finds peace in allowing the full experience of her grief to be felt and known. Sometimes, hard as that is, it brings resolution that otherwise might not have existed.<br /><br />And I too hope our world were different than I often fear it is, let alone will be. The thing I hold on to is that ~most people are good, decent and kind, even if many are ignorant and making bad decisions.Yvonnenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-66437491693023319612012-07-14T00:38:36.796-04:002012-07-14T00:38:36.796-04:00Magick, I can't thank you enough for your comm...Magick, I can't thank you enough for your comment. I know that sharing something this personal and emotional has to be difficult. I don't care how many years go by, the pain is there. The passage of time can dull the sensation and process the grief, but losing a child is a hurt that never fully heals, regardless of the circumstances or length of time we have them. I am sorry that you were not given the opportunity to see and touch your baby. As painful as that would have been, it, perhaps would have given you some closure and comfort.Alicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03027350217120088046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-42671658465551455582012-07-14T00:32:12.570-04:002012-07-14T00:32:12.570-04:00Thank you, ladies for all of your comments. I just...Thank you, ladies for all of your comments. I just can't express how sad and angry this whole situation makes me. When she made the decision to terminate the pregnancy, she was so afraid that people would judge her and she worried about making the wrong decision. Now, to be told that she does not have that option forces her to feel that judgment and guilt even more.Alicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03027350217120088046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-17920807059086111422012-07-13T11:48:32.800-04:002012-07-13T11:48:32.800-04:00It is infuriating! I feel for your friend.
I h...It is infuriating! I feel for your friend. <br /><br />I had an anencephaly baby almost 30 years ago, like your friend i was also in my 7th month. At the time, I was living in South Africa and system was vastly different, terminations were allowed under three rules only - 1. if the woman had been raped; 2. if the pregnancy was risking the mother's health or 3. if there were abnormalities of the fetus.<br /><br />There were few discussions after it was discovered that Thomas was an anenchephaly baby, but they were less about termination options; the termination was a given. Labour induction was begun within an hour after the scans. Due to circumstances, i eventually had to have a c-section and was told he died straight away.<br /><br />Looking back, i feel torn at the way things were handled. I was not given any choices, perhaps a good thing considering how young I was - my gynae was very patronising and yet, somewhat paternal as well. The nurses were all very matter-of-fact talking about if he lived for any length of time, he would not be fed but would be 'made comfortable' and that he would be taken away as soon as he was born as 'it would not do me any good to see him'. That haunted me for the longest time.<br /><br />argh .. sorry I've written quite a lengthy comment. As much as I think about my children who've died, I don't spend time going into the details and am always surprised, on the rare occasion that I do, just how raw some of the feelings still are. Thank you for this post.Sadist's magickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06781230922110785864noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-22326096124391347212012-07-12T23:19:42.451-04:002012-07-12T23:19:42.451-04:00Infuriating. And it's those without a lot of m...Infuriating. And it's those without a lot of money who suffer from this the most. Because the rich can always hop a plane and go to a state or a country where the procedure they need is still available.oatmeal girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12842608615972752000noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-47152471884771872302012-07-12T21:57:55.323-04:002012-07-12T21:57:55.323-04:00I feel so bad for your friend and her family...and...I feel so bad for your friend and her family...and I share your anger at the unjust laws which deprive her of the right to make such a personal and painful decision. Please give her a hug from a stranger. Pain shared is -- shared.<br /><br />swanSuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03961893281142538409noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-29518003334519584452012-05-26T17:28:29.242-04:002012-05-26T17:28:29.242-04:00Just dropping by and leaving a note... Wish all is...Just dropping by and leaving a note... Wish all is well, thinking of you.<br /><br />Love,<br />LouiseLouisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15230260773818031094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-78761815128523288852012-02-01T19:28:14.300-05:002012-02-01T19:28:14.300-05:00You're too sweet. But I think I do understand ...You're too sweet. But I think I do understand completely.<br /><br />Love,<br />LouiseLouisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15230260773818031094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-64899096646541070802011-12-07T22:10:52.494-05:002011-12-07T22:10:52.494-05:00When lives run, as interwoven threads through the ...When lives run, as interwoven threads through the tapestry of time, there is that sense of inevitability to the meetings. I am glad for you both...<br /><br />swanSuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03961893281142538409noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-60983513854333860332011-12-07T00:49:24.478-05:002011-12-07T00:49:24.478-05:00There is something in that word - bashert - that i...There is something in that word - bashert - that is stronger than any attempt at translation can possibly convey.<br /><br />o.g.oatmeal girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12842608615972752000noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-3218834922507552812011-09-30T20:37:10.304-04:002011-09-30T20:37:10.304-04:00There is so little to offer here. I hope that, da...There is so little to offer here. I hope that, day by day, you are all granted a measure of peace and comfort. <br /><br />All the best,<br />swanSuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03961893281142538409noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-63885381108000253802011-09-30T17:57:59.711-04:002011-09-30T17:57:59.711-04:00My sweet friend, I wish I could come over, hold ha...My sweet friend, I wish I could come over, hold hands and talk all night long, or just sit together in silence. <br /><br />My thoughts are with you, and I dearly wish you all the stength you need. And above strength: love, much much love.<br /><br />xxxLouisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15230260773818031094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-31742611188613974592011-09-30T10:42:01.801-04:002011-09-30T10:42:01.801-04:00Oh hon...
I really don't have words.
You hav...Oh hon...<br /><br />I really don't have words.<br /><br />You have my deep compassion and so does your family.<br /><br />I hope you all find the comfort of each other and any other healing help you each need.<br /><br />Hugs..Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-42427124989818373062011-09-28T19:17:58.071-04:002011-09-28T19:17:58.071-04:00I do remember last year, and it does seem such a l...I do remember last year, and it does seem such a long time... As I said before, your love shines through everything you write, and that is most wonderful. <br /><br />Wishing you both love and peace,<br />louiseLouisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15230260773818031094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-4358884098479081872011-09-18T14:53:35.244-04:002011-09-18T14:53:35.244-04:00Thank you Swan. It has been difficult for him, J i...Thank you Swan. It has been difficult for him, J is the oldest and B was the youngest, which made it seem even more unfair and wrong. In many ways, I think that dealing with this tragedy has brought us closer. It has certainly increased my love and respect for J, seeing how thoughtful and supportive he has been for B's family. <br /><br />I know your family has endured more than their share of grief these past few years, I hope for good things for all of you from here on out.Alicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03027350217120088046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-66259295677316119592011-09-18T12:27:04.984-04:002011-09-18T12:27:04.984-04:00A year has passed, and it may seem to be very late...A year has passed, and it may seem to be very late, but please accept my condolences on the loss you have endured -- and do, please, offer that sympathy to J. Grieving knows nothing of the calendar. I hope there is the beginning of comfort in memory for you all.<br /><br />s.Suehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03961893281142538409noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-46528228258672567192011-06-19T08:09:56.618-04:002011-06-19T08:09:56.618-04:00What we have, that we deserve. So just be gratefu...What we have, that we deserve. So just be grateful, don't call yourself undeserving or lucky, leave that kind of judgement to others.<br /><br />The empath thing is most interesting. I wish you could pass a little of it on to me! I have very little of that.Malcolmhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18156162412655551672noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-55673828871509969942011-06-14T04:37:26.424-04:002011-06-14T04:37:26.424-04:00Oh Alice, you don't have to blame anyone, defi...Oh Alice, you don't have to blame anyone, definitely not yourself, and even when you tried you couldn't be stupid! Will that make it a little bit easier to have some patience with you?<br /><br />The change... I do think that is a turning point where everything in our lives accumulates and asks for a different approach. The inability to juggle and multitask all the time does not happen because we can not *do* so anymore, but because our body and mind tell us not to *want* so anymore. The lack of concentration and initiative is not a sign of decreasing mental capabilities, but a new tool to help us to ponder things in other ways than we were used to. The deepening of intuition and empathy is also another tool for just that, I think: to support us on this part of our lives, to enable us to heal and to become whole (again). <br /><br />The constant... yes, lucky and blessed you are, but please delete the 'undeserving' in that last sentence?<br /><br /> Wishing you a beautiful week,<br /><br />Love,<br />LouiseLouisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15230260773818031094noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-40767826839095376552011-06-05T10:37:48.826-04:002011-06-05T10:37:48.826-04:00Swan and Louise, Thank you both for your good wish...Swan and Louise, Thank you both for your good wishes. I know I am not here much anymore, but when I am I look for the two of you. I feel a kindred spirit with both of you. Hope you are well.Alicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03027350217120088046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2197085117116794403.post-758877856844931432011-06-02T10:48:14.199-04:002011-06-02T10:48:14.199-04:00My very best wishes for many, many years to come.
...My very best wishes for many, many years to come.<br /><br />Love, <br />LouiseLouisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15230260773818031094noreply@blogger.com