Monday, September 21, 2009

If You Seek Amy

My musical tastes are pretty wide ranging. I listen to everything from opera to rap. I love the classical rock that I grew up with (I refuse to call it "the oldies"). I appreciate the relevance of rap lyrics (even the nasty ones). Classical music of all types touch my soul deeply. Folk music makes me want to march in a protest. What I most often listen to is current and contemporary...rock, hip-hop, alternative, pop. I also have a tendency to sing along. So...the other day, I was working in the kitchen and singing along to a CD when my son walked through. He stopped and listened a minute, then he said, "Do you even know what you are singing?" "Sure", I answered and kept singing. "No, really Mom, listen to the words." I listened for a minute and heard nothing other than what I had sung. "When she says, if you seek Amy, she's really saying...F.U.C.K. me." After he told me that, there was so much I left unsaid. I still sing along, I just smile now. I'm not nearly as old as he thinks I am.

Speaking of F.U.C.K. me, J was here last week. The frequency of His visits has increased lately. I am very happy about that. The more I am with Him, the more that I want Him. Though we had been together just two weeks before, I needed Him badly. I needed to serve Him, I needed His cock, I needed Him to spank me. I know the time we share is a far cry from 24/7, but I wonder if I could ever get enough. The past two years have only made me want Him more, want to give Him more. I feel that we are just beginning our journey, there is still so much I want to experience with Him. I belong to Him, with my entire being. He gives me strength, He makes life bearable, He gives me a sense of purpose and He defines my identity in a way I have never known before. There is a certain rightness about lying over His lap, naked and surrendered. Receiving His spankings calms me, relaxes me (okay, maybe not right at that moment), affirms my place with Him.

J, I will be yours forever. I hope you choose to accept me as long.

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